CHIP OFF THE OLD TALKS viii
(Autistic Author)
They sit in silence for a few moments,
the sound of Plankton's slowing breaths
filling the space. Karen's mind races with
the conversation they need to have with
Chip.
"How do we explain it?" Plankton asks,
finally breaking the silence. His
antennae still, his eye looking at the
floor.
"We tell him the truth," Karen says firmly.
"But we also remind him of all the
wonderful things you do for him, all the
ways you show him love."
Plankton sighs, his antennae drooping
further. "I know I'm not the dad he
deserves," he murmurs.
Karen's voice is firm, but filled with
warmth. "You are the dad he needs,"
she corrects. "And we'll get through this
together."
Finally, Plankton's
antennae perk up slightly. "I'm sorry," he
says again, his voice still thick with
emotion.
Karen nods. "I know," she says softly.
"But we can't keep hiding this from him.
He needs to understand."
Plankton sighs, his antennae drooping.
"I know," he admits. "I just don't know
where to start."
Karen gives his hand a gentle squeeze.
"We'll start by talking to him," she says,
her voice strong and reassuring. "When
you're ready."
They sit there for a while longer, the
rhythm of Plankton's breathing slowly
returning to normal. Karen's mind is
racing with thoughts of how to navigate this
chapter in their lives. How to help Chip
understand his father's condition without scaring
him or making him feel responsible.
Finally, Plankton turns to her, his antennae still shaky.
"What do we do now?" he asks, his voice a mix of exhaustion and fear.
Karen takes a deep breath, her eyes filled with resolve.
"First," she says, "we make sure you're ok."
They sit there, the only sound in the room the distant
hum of the TV. Plankton's antennae are still, his eye
focused on the floor. Karen's hand remains on his
back, a silent promise that she's there for him.
"Let's get you to bed," she says softly. "You need to rest."
With her help, Plankton stands, his legs wobbly from
the intense episode. Together, they make their way
to their bedroom, the quiet of the house a stark
contrast to the emotional upheaval they've just
experienced.
Once Plankton is tucked into bed, Karen sits beside
him, her hand resting on his arm. "We'll get through
this," she says, her voice a gentle reassurance in the
stillness. "We're a family."
Plankton's antennae twitch with a hint of doubt, and
he looks up at her, his eye searching hers for
understanding. "But what if I can't?"
Karen's gaze is unwavering. "You can," she says
firmly. "You're strong, Plankton. And we're here to
help you."
Plankton's antennae quiver, and he nods slowly.
"Ok," he whispers. "Ok."
Karen leans in, kissing his forehead. "Rest," she
says. "We'll talk more tomorrow."
With a nod, Plankton closes his eye, and Karen slips
out of the room, leaving the door open a crack. She
heads to Chip's room, heavy with the weight of the
conversation they need to have.
Chip is lying on his bed, his small form wrapped in a
blanket, staring at the ceiling. His eyes are red, and
he looks up as Karen enters.
"Hey, buddy," she says softly, sitting beside him.
"Can we talk?"
Chip nods, his eyes still wet with tears. "What's
wrong with Daddy?" he asks, his voice shaky.
Karen takes a deep breath, choosing her words
carefully. "Daddy has something called Autism,
sweetie," she says, her voice gentle. "It makes his
brain work a bit differently from ours. Sometimes,
when he's really upset or overwhelmed, his body can
react in ways that might seem strange or scary."
Chip's eyes are wide with curiosity, and he nods
slowly. "Is that why he gets so mad?" he asks.
Karen takes a moment before responding. "Sometimes, yes,"
she says. "It's his way of dealing
with big feelings. But it's not because he's mad at you, ok?"
Chip nods, his eyes searching hers for reassurance.
"But why does he get so mad?" he asks again, his
voice quivering.
Karen sighs, her hand stroking him. "Daddy gets
overwhelmed by his feelings, and it's hard for him to
express them," she explains. "Sometimes, when he
can't find the right words or when things get too
much, he feels like he's going to break apart. That's
what we call a meltdown."
Chip sniffs, his eyes glued to the ceiling. "It's like
when I'm really sad and I don't want to talk?"
Karen nods, her heart swelling with love for her son's
empathy. "Exactly," she says. "And just like you,
Daddy needs some space when that happens."
Chip looks at her, his eyes serious. "But what if I
want to show him my affection?"
Karen smiles sadly. "You can, Chip," she says. "Just
remember to be gentle, and maybe use words or
gestures that aren't to overwhelming for him."
Chip nods, his eyes still on the ceiling. "But what if I
make it worse?" he whispers.
Karen's heart clenches at his fear, and she takes his
hand in hers. "Sometimes, we just need to learn new
ways to show and receive love."
Chip nods, his eyes glistening with unshed tears.
"Ok," he says, his voice barely above a whisper.
Karen leans in, placing a soft kiss on his forehead.
"You're brave," she says, her voice filled with pride.
"But what about the rock he broke?" Chip asks, his
voice still shaky.
Karen sighs, her eyes meeting his. "Daddy didn't
mean to scare you," she says. "Sometimes, when
people are upset, they do things they don't mean to.
It's part of how they cope."
Chip nods, his grip on her hand tightening. "But
Dad now," he says again, his voice small.
"We'll give him some time to rest," Karen assures him.
"And tomorrow, we'll talk about it more."
With that, she tucks the blanket around him and turns
to leave. As she reaches the door, Chip's voice stops
her. "Mom," he says, his tone tentative. "Can I go to Daddy?"
Karen's heart skips a beat, and she looks back at
him, her eyes filled with both concern and hope. "Do
you think that's a good idea, sweetie?"
Chip nods. "I want to tell him I love him," he says, his
voice barely above a whisper.
Karen's heart squeezes. "Ok," she says, taking a
deep breath. "But remember, we need to be gentle
with him right now. Let's go to his room together."
They tiptoe down the hall, the house eerily quiet.
Karen can feel Chip's hand in hers, small and warm
and trembling slightly. When they reach the bedroom,
she opens the door quietly and peeks in. Plankton is
lying on his back, his antennae still, his chest rising
and falling with deep, even breaths.
They approach the bed, and Karen can see the
tension in Plankton's body, even in sleep. She
whispers to Chip, "Remember, sweetie, just a little.
And if he wakes up, tell him you love him."
Chip nods solemnly, and together, they tiptoe to the
bedside. Chip extends a tentative hand and gently
pats Plankton's arm. Plankton's antennae twitch, but
he doesn't wake. "I love you, Daddy," Chip whispers,
his voice quivering.
Karen's eyes fill with tears at the sight of her son's
bravery and love. She gives Chip's hand a squeeze.
"That was perfect," she says, her voice barely a
murmur.
They stand there for a moment, watching Plankton's
chest rise and fall in the dim light of the moon
peeking through the curtains. Then, with a heavy
heart, Karen leads Chip back to his room.
Once Chip is tucked in, she kisses his forehead and
whispers, "You're a brave boy, and I'm so proud of
you." His eyes, still red and swollen from crying,
meet hers with a quiet understanding beyond his
years.