I've been thinking about suicide again. Everything just keeps getting worse.
Especially the hallucinations... I really think I need medications, as it affects my day to day
life and it's stressing me out so much. But my parents still don't want to give me any meds...
Not even for things like ADHD or anxiety. I keep getting flashbacks, too. And don't even get me
started on the panic attacks. Honestly, no matter what I do I genuinely don't think I can ever
live a good life because I'm not a boy. If I just kill myself there's the chance of being reincarnated
as a boy, or at least some other creature that's better than a human girl. I'm just honestly done
with everything. I don't care who'll miss me, because I really, really hate myself so much I
can't even put it into words. I don't want to be trans, I want to be a real boy. This
fucking sucks. No amount of self harm will be enough to fix this, I think at the end of the
day, committing is the only way out of this fucking hellhole.
---ASH0NP4WZZ🧷