• I'm the human form of the 100 emoji. [replace 100 with any emoji]
• I'm sorry for what I said when I was hungry.
• I'm not lazy, I'm just on my energy-saving mode.
• I'm in a relationship with my bed. We sleep together every night.
• If you can't handle me at my worst, then you don't deserve me at my best.
• If you can't handle me at my worst, then I honestly don't blame you because I am a mess 😌
• I'm the type of person who will burst out laughing in a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
• I'm not short, I'm fun-sized.
• I'm the type of person who will say "goodnight" and then keep talking.